If you know a new mom or are one yourself, get ready to discover some of the best ways to lend a helping hand during this incredible and sometimes overwhelming journey. Being a new mom is like riding a rollercoaster of emotions and responsibilities for all moms, especially first time moms), and having a strong support system can make all the difference.
In this post, we’ll share some simple tips and practical ways that you can be the rock-solid support every new mom needs. From practical assistance that lightens the load to offering a listening ear and a sprinkle of encouragement, you’ll be amazed at how much your presence and care can mean to a new mama. A little bit of help can go a long way! So, let’s jump right in and learn how to make this precious time even more special together!
#1 Offer Practical Help
New mothers often have their hands full with the demands of caring for a newborn. Offer to assist with practical tasks such as cooking meals, doing laundry, cleaning the house, or running errands. You could offer to make phone calls or run to the post office. These small gestures can go a long way in easing her workload. Offer to fill her water bottle! Even something as small as this shows the new mom she has a good friend in you.
Cook meals: Prepare a few freezer-friendly meals for the new mom to heat up when needed. Alternatively, you can offer her and her family a home-cooked meal or organize a meal delivery service during her postpartum period. This was the best thing people did for me as a new mom.
Do laundry: Help with the laundry by washing, folding, and putting away the clothes. This can save her time and energy.
Clean the house: Offer to help new parents with cleaning tasks such as vacuuming, dusting, or mopping the floors. A clean environment can make a big difference in her well-being. Ask for her to-do list and check some things off for her.
How to Help with Household Chores:
- Wash dishes: Offer to do the dishes or load and unload the dishwasher.
- Vacuum or mop the floors: Take care of cleaning the floors to save her time and energy.
- Tidy up: Help organize and declutter the living space, especially in areas that may have become messy or cluttered.
- Running errands: Volunteer to pick up groceries from the grocery store, prescriptions, or other necessary errands so the new mom doesn’t have to leave the house.
#2 Provide Emotional Support
Becoming a mother can be overwhelming, and a new mom may experience a range of emotions. Be there to listen and offer a shoulder to lean on. Encourage her to express her feelings and assure her that she is doing a great job.
Be a good listener: Allow first-time moms to express their feelings, fears, or frustrations without judgment. Offer a listening ear and provide empathy and understanding.
Offer words of encouragement during this time of new motherhood: Remind her that she’s doing a great job and that it’s normal to feel overwhelmed. Encourage her to be patient with herself and celebrate even small victories.
Here are some examples of things you could say:
- “You’re doing an amazing job as a mom!”
- “You’ve got this, mama! Trust your instincts.”
- “Your baby is lucky to have such a caring and loving mom like you.”
- “Your love and dedication to your baby are evident in everything you do.”
- “Your love and patience are making a difference in your baby’s life.”
- “You’re a natural at motherhood!”
Be genuine and sincere in your praise, and let her know that she’s doing an incredible job in her new role as a mother, especially during this newborn stage. And always comment on her social media posts! She is looking for positive feedback. Sometimes, a like or an “aw” comment can be the best gift.
Share your own experiences: If you’ve been through motherhood yourself, sharing your own experiences (if appropriate) can help her feel less alone as she settles into her new normal.
How to Share Your Experiences With a New Mom Without Sounding Judgy
Sharing your own experiences with a new mom can be a great way to offer support and let her know she’s not alone. However, it’s essential to do so in a nonjudgmental and supportive way.
Here are some tips on how to share your experiences without sounding judgy:
- When sharing your experiences, use “I” statements to make it clear that you are sharing from your personal perspective. For example, say, “When I was a new mom, I found it helpful to…” rather than making general statements like, “You should do this…”
- Avoid making direct comparisons. Instead of saying, “I did it this way, and it worked perfectly,” focus on the lessons you learned and how your experience shaped your approach. This way, you’re offering insights without implying that your way is the only right way.
- Offer your experiences as suggestions, not instructions. Present your experiences as potential ideas that she can consider, not as rigid rules she must follow. For instance, say, “Something that worked for me was…” or “You might find it helpful to try…”
- Show understanding and empathy for the challenges she’s facing, and acknowledge that every mother’s journey is unique. Avoid downplaying her struggles by saying things like, “Oh, it’s not that bad,” or “You think that’s tough, let me tell you what I went through…”
- Before sharing your experiences, take the time to listen to her thoughts and feelings first. This way, she will feel heard and valued and may be more receptive to hearing about your experiences.
- Share stories that highlight positive outcomes or personal growth rather than emphasizing mistakes or negative experiences. Positive and uplifting stories can be more encouraging and inspiring.
- If the new mom has made different choices from yours, respect her decisions without criticizing or trying to change her mind. It’s essential to support her in her choices, even if they differ from your own.
- Let her know that you are available for advice or a listening ear whenever she needs it, but don’t push your opinions or experiences on her if she doesn’t ask for them.
#3 Help With Childcare
Offer to hold the newborn for a few hours so the mom can rest, a nice long shower (as opposed to the quick shower she’s been taking lately), or simply a break. This can give her some valuable time to recharge and care for herself. Or offer to take care of the older children if she has any. She will appreciate being able to devote full attention to her new baby during these newborn days, knowing that her other kids are in good hands.
#4 Provide Resources and Information
If the new mom is seeking information on parenting, breastfeeding, or other related topics, help her find reliable resources or recommend support groups, a lactation consultant, parenting classes, or online communities where she can connect with other moms who are going through similar experiences.
We highly recommend the “Newborns Made Easy Class” taught by taught by Hilary Erickson BSN-RN, The Pregnancy Nurse®. 100% online, this class includes lessons on:
- Diapering
- Taking Baby’s Temperature
- Swaddling a Newborn Baby
- Bulb Syringe Use
- Baths
- Daily Routines
- Newborn Sleep
#5 Offer Companionship
Being a new mom can sometimes feel isolating. Offer to spend time with her, whether it’s going for a walk, having a cup of tea, or simply chatting. Your presence can provide much-needed companionship and a chance for her to share her joys and challenges.
You can:
- Encourage her to get some fresh air and exercise by going for a walk together, either with or without the baby.
- Sit down with her, have a drink, and simply chat about life, motherhood, or anything she wants to discuss.
#6 Bring Meals or Organize a Meal Train
Coordinate with friends or family members to provide meals for the new mom and her family. Preparing meals can be time-consuming, and having nutritious food delivered can be a huge relief.
#7 Encourage Self Care
Remind the new mom to take care of herself. Encourage her to rest, eat well, and engage in activities that bring her joy and relaxation. Offer to care for the baby while she takes a nap or indulge in some self-care time. If you notice that she’s struggling with postpartum depression (it’s more than just the baby blues), encourage her to seek professional help. Symptoms of postpartum depression always need to be taken seriously.
Check out our list of things new moms need for themselves!
#8 Celebrate Milestones
Acknowledge and celebrate the milestones of the newborn, such as the first smile or a successful breastfeeding session. These small gestures of celebration can bring joy and positivity to the new mom’s life. Take photos of the new family that include any older siblings.
For example:
- First smile: Congratulate her on the baby’s first smile and share in the joy and excitement.
- Successful breastfeeding session: Acknowledge her efforts and encourage her in her breastfeeding journey.
Remember, the most important thing is to be present and show your support in a way that feels comfortable for both you and the new mom. Each person may have different needs, so it’s essential to communicate and ask how you can best support her during this special time.
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